9.25.2012

Incarnational Healer

I've been thinking lately about what it is I do as a therapist.  Often, people seem to think I'm a fixer, sometimes myself included, which quickly leads to crazy because I am in fact, not able to fix another person.  Thank God I do not have that much power.  Lately, I've found myself gravitating toward the word healer, not in the sense that I give healing but rather that I invite and walk with folks towards healing.  Included in this healing relationship is acceptance of a person as they are, not as they 'should' be.  Carl Rogers termed this 'unconditional positive regard'. John talks about 'perfect love' (1J4:18) which has no fear.  I believe this type of loving drives out at least the fear of rejection, shaming, punishment, betrayal, etc.  

This healing does not come from some outer strength or skills, but comes from the indwelling of the Spirit who puts Christ on my flesh, allowing me to incarnate the one who touched the lepers, and just as the lepers received emotional and spiritual healing when the Christ gave them physically intimate touch when healing their diseases, as I incarnate Christ I am privileged to give emotionally intimate 'touch' the those parts of people they feel are unclean, shamed and outcast.  I imagine the leper living outside the city longed for this kind of knowing touch for years before receiving it from Jesus.  I have come to know many (myself foremost) who long to be emotionally known and healed in much the same way.

In her book on healing those who have been wounded by abuse, Diane Langberg spoke of being an incarnational healer in saying:
"All that we do as those who name the name of Christ is to be both incarnational and redemptive.  Our words are to communicate his truth.  Our person is to reflect his person.  Our lives are to be a living, breathing explanation of his character. Those who sit with us in our office should have a better understanding of who God is because we have, through our obedience to him and love for him, touched them with the flavor of his presence.
The ability to give others a taste of Christ by leading to the way of healing is short-lived and possibly inauthentic if it is to be mustered up out of something in my self.  The underlying necessity of me being a healer comes by way of receiving my own healing.  Brennan puts this pointedly in his book 'The Furious Longing of God'. 
"Healing becomes the opportunity to pass off to another human being what I have received from the Lord Jesus; namely His unconditional acceptance of me as I am, not as I should be. He loves me whether in a state of grace or disgrace, whether I live up to the lofty expectations of His gospel or I don't. He comes to me where I live and loves me as I am.  When I have passed that same reality on to another human being, the result most often has been the inner healing of their heart through the touch of my affirmation. To affirm a person is to see the good in them that they cannot see in themselves and to repeat it in spite of appearances to the contrary."
To receive people as they are without the demand that they get better, stop sinning, or hide the offensive is to be as Christ to the lepers, whores and thieves.  To touch people with emotional acceptance reflects Christ touching the contagious.  This gospel act turns people away from their failed attempts of healing via sin, and towards the true giver and restorer of life.  As a therapist I participate in the healing ministry of my elder brother Jesus, with particular focus of healing on emotional and spiritual wounds.

9.05.2012

Self Awareness of Poverty and Love

It seems dichotomous to think that the Christian walk involves knowing oneself as a poor and desperately needy child, while at the same time knowing oneself as a child who has received the favor and affection of Abba God.  In my life it seems that I have often veered towards living solely in either one or the other awareness.  At times I focus in on my life as the beloved and begin to think it is because of my great gifts, skills or lovability, which leads to an over-inflated view of self.  At other times I find myself dwelling on my utter poverty and depravity of mind and heart, which often leads to a despondent and hateful view of self.

To hold these two seemingly dichotomous views together in tension involves seeing myself as one who was loved first (1 John 4:19) and who is blessed in my poverty (Matt. 5:3), fully aware of being both depraved and beloved.  This leads to a proper self awareness, which frees me from either thinking too highly of myself without merit or too lowly without the merit of Christ.

"The first step in liberation from self-hatred is to move from the darkness of self-delusion into the daylight of God's truth...to accept that I am unacceptable, to renounce self-justification, to give up my preposterous pretending that my paltry prayers, spiritual insights, knowledge of Scripture, and blustering successes in ministry have made me pleasing to God.  No antecedent beauty enamors me in his eyes.  I am lovable because he loves me.  Period." ~Brennan Manning