To Fear and Trust

These past few weeks post-graduation have been plagued with constant attacks of panic and fear, particularly the fear that things will be turned on their heads.  Bank accounts, car issues, tenants moving out, new job transition, a hurricane which the news seemed to think was imminently more catastrophic than any hurricane to date, financial woes, etc.,etc.,etc.  I found myself on the brink of despair, with the words of 'I quit' lingering on my tongue.  Yet, all the while, I've had this nagging sense that it would be okay, not because these things would work out and go just the way I had planned for them to go, but because of a deep and prevailing sense of trust in Abba's character.

I began to think of how much energy I put into the fear of all these things (and no doubt many others).  Quite frankly, a lot.  My mind then began to be drawn to so many passages in which Scripture refers to 'fearing the Lord' (Prov. 1:7; 19:23; Deut. 6:1-3; Jonah 1:9).  Honestly, I've not enjoyed these passages in the past as they never really set well with me.  It seems that the truth of fearing the Lord has begun to take root in me now as I find myself uttering phrases like "Abba, if you don't show up, I'm done for", or "If you let me go, I perish".  This stirs up appropriate fear.  If God turns His back on me, or turns his wrath towards me, I don't stand a chance.  The fear of Him now begins to far outweigh the fear of money loss, car issues, house foreclosure, etc.

Yet paired with this truth belong many others, including the truth of His covenant making love which he promises to direct towards me and a thousand generations to follow me (Deut. 7:9,10; 1 Chron. 16:15); the truth of the refuge He provides to the pursued, travel-weary and lost (2 Sam. 22:3; Psalm 7:1; 36:7; Heb. 6:18); the truth of my adoption as a full son who shares all things with my brother Jesus - including the Father's affirmation, affection and intent for glory (Rom. 8:15; 8:23; Gal. 4:5; Eph. 1:5).

"But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons.  And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, "Abba! Father!" Galatians 4:4-6

To be afraid of the Creator and Sustainer of life is appropriate and right, so long as it is paired with knowing the goodness of a Father who does not give a stone to his son when asked for something to eat.